Life's Little
Deconstruction Book:
Self-Help for the Post-Hip

by Andrew Boyd [who?]
dec '98 •
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Win Prizes!!

Readers write your own! The book has 365 post-modern maxims--one for every day--but we forgot about the leap year! The 366 slot is empty and will be filled by our readers' best ideas. Entries must begin with "366", be written in the imperative voice, and nicely capture an aspect of post-modern existence. Winners will receive free books, a t-shirt, stickers and a bizarre post-modern artifact (such as a Japanese lawn ornament showing Santa nailed to a cross).

To enter the contest, email your post-modern maxim & contact info to the author.

Reader entries so far:

366. Problematize whatever.
366. Use fuzzy math to determine your signal-to-noise ratio.
366. Mean meaning, sort of.
366. Give Freud the slip.
366. Become.
366. Burn your race card.
366. Interrogate prepositions.
366. Fetishize.
366. Sustain the illusion.
366. Let your core competencies wither away.
366. Wear the prisoner's uniform in order to escape the prison.
366. Return the first one.
366. Complicate simplicity.
366. Prioritize frivolity.
366. Choose ambivalence.
366. Ride the tigers of signification.
366. Make the book that you are writing read itself.
366. Be beyond your own beyondness.
366. Employ the obvious as an even subtler subtlety.
366. Appropriate discourse.
366. Lose the life and start living.
366. Never explain yourself, if you want to be understood.
366. Don't drive thru, drive by.
366. Bend over and take it like an essentialist.
366. Ease your consciousness.
366. Leap and look.
366. Sit. Stay.
366. Rule by exception.
366. Unveil the absence of style.
366. Believe it is a pipe.
366. Honor slippage.
366. Calm hyper-text.
366. Tie yourself up in tropes.
366. Think teleologically; act rhyzomically.
366. Master the narrative.
366. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
366. Assume nothing.
366. Titrate intensity.
366. Open wide.
366. Let's.
366. Cross your borders.
366. Implicate complicity.
366. Decentralize the heart.
366. Adopt a delusional standpoint.
366. Caress syntax.
366. Gimmie a fuckin t-shirt already.
366. Let your diagnosis be your guide.
366. Don't want fries with that.
366. Nap aggressively!
366. Love what you know to be ultra-uber-hyper-post-now.
366. Kill all who knew you before you were hip.
366. Live in the moment, but not so long that it becomes passe.
366. Remember, they're just jealous.
366. Signify your own significance.
366. Understate hyperbole.
366. [Your entry here.]

To enter the contest, email your post-modern maxim & contact info to the author.